Red is going to blog..
but what about?



When i get to close to something... even if im just talking to someone.. it hurts because i know they will leave sometime... Its hard even to be sentimental in a short ti e, because i have to get to that state, it just sdoesnt happen in about an hour. Its best when we can spend the whole day together.. so I can just, get used to being myself.

I've been reading, which is scary for me. I have a list of new books I want, but have to wait til Christmas. I want to read like nothing else, but first. somehow. I have to improve my grades, because this is amature work. I could be doing a hell of a lot better. But Im not.

This week, taking it slow. Taking time to think, time to reconsider things. This next weekend is trick or treating and Im quiet happy. Then I just realized, we have a shortened week this week. and I have to come up with over 40 cupcakes for International Club Party after school on Tuesday. Oh boy.. meh... I really don't want to, but it will be nice. Then tech after the party.

Im really hoping I wont be alone when we have off, maybe spend some time with the one i want to spend some time with, because i absolutely miss him. But probobly not, probobly will catch up on reading and watch bleach.

Its so odd for me to blog, one because who reads these, and two because its just my words.. who cares...

Im dont with talking to teachers at school, cause they put words into my mouth and talk to my parents.. I hate it, but oh well. What am I to do..

And Just when it couldnt get worse.. My Ex is telling his friends.. which are my friends.. to remove me from their friends list.. for god knows what.. its been over 3 months.. dammit.. this is bull shit.. thats what I think... he has no say in who they have on their friends list.. that was a dick move

I just realized... One of my favorite things is Glow bracelets.. Im wearing two blue ones.., why? I dont know for sure.

I want to write, but too many words to write... If i wrote everything i had on a piece of paper, it would make no sense.. and ... it wouuld probbly be a good idea.. hehe.. I should try that.. I think i will. When I get home.. just write everything down.. Nothing to loose, nothing to fear.

My feelings are strong... My love is strong for him. My feelings will never fade. Things will get better..

One Day

-Red